la dee da

Done with my journals...really need to start on my grad paper...
I had a revelation of sorts as I was driving home from the gym though...I haven't really been "with myself" (focused on me and me alone) since I was 15. That is 13 years. It was old Jeff until I was 22, then off for a few months--dated around, kissed many boys, then Chris, then dated a bit--kissed more boys, then new Jeff, then Joel...and I haven't just had a chance to get comfortable with who I am for an extended period of time, therefore, when I get involved I am crazy lady who doesn't know who she even is and becomes lost and gives up too much for assholes who aren't worth it. So my mission is to take a year off (I decided this March 3, just didn't articulate it or understand why I needed to) from all boys. No serious/fun/casual/nothing. Which blows, but I think that is my main source of problems. I am pretty sure that this is what Dr. J has been trying to tell me for the past 6 years, but hey--it may have finally sunk in.
Plus, I read a super funny Glamour list today that is hung on my wall with the funny part circled. It is called "12 things to keep secret forever." The one circled states: "The fact that your ex had serious problems in the erectile department. Unless, of course, he did you wrong, in which case, feel free to shout it from the rooftops." LMAO!!!!!!!!!! :) I need to head up to the rooftop for all of the above listed!