So, I know that anything good does not come easy. Greatness comes from really really REALLY hard work. I wish that there was more of a focus on this concept rather than society's ill-informed view that good things just appear and life is easy.
In tough times, many give up. Rather than work to make something happen, many choose to take the easier path.
Sometimes I wonder why I'm not like that. I generally choose the hardest path available. And usually, it hurts.
I decided that my relationship is worth the effort. No, we aren't married (part of the challenge I'm faced with right now), but he is my family, my safety net, my comfort, my home. He is, and more importantly, we are, worth the work and effort.
In response to my gut feeling that more of an effort had to happen in our relationship to take pressure off him (so he wouldn't think about wedding/marriage), I suggested that once a week we switch off making plans--a "date night" of sorts. We started this week--my choice/plan. I researched things to do and narrowed it down to two choices--Cannon Beach (suggested by friends) and the Portland International Brewfest. The latter won--Louie loves imported beers, and an afternoon people/dog watching in the city with good beer and awesome weather was more up my alley.
It was awesome. I got to drive (my date night=I am in control) and we scored a table in the shade. Louie got to try 6 different beers (me too even if they were just mini-sips as I was the DD). We had good food--he bought us an awesome cheese plate complete with a baguette, salami, and grapes, and it was relaxing and super awesome.
It is his week next week, and he told me already what the plan is--on Wednesday we are going to a Mariners game!!! It will be our first time at Safeco Field, AND they are playing the White Sox, so I'll at least know some players.
Louie doesn't even like baseball.
I don't expect "date night" to be all about money/spending money--going for a walk and curling up on the couch watching tv could constitute a "date night;" the point is more in the effort itself--consciously making an effort to put our relationship at the forefront for an evening/afternoon/morning.
I used to wonder how relationships could get to the point where dates would have to be discussed and really plotted out or where sex would have to be scheduled in order to make it happen--but it can happen--relationships are HARD. Good relationships, great relationships don't just appear out of thin air. Couples have to equally give (yes, thanks Dr. Phil) 100%-100% in order to work and survive and thrive.
Growing up sucks sometimes. Becoming "learn-ned" is rough!!! Nothing worth having comes easy--at least not anything I've encountered thus far.
Maybe I'm wrong though--maybe things shouldn't be this hard?
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That's a Wrap
4 years ago
